Thank you for letting me be your mother, and for letting Minato
be your father. Thank you for being our son. Thank you… Thank you!
I JUST REALIZED THAT THE PLURAL OF BEEF IS BEEVES
LOOK AT THIS
WAS I THE ONLY ONE WHO DIDNT KNOW ABOUT BEEVES
i just told my roommate this and he just got up and left the apartment, and didn’t come back right away so i went outside and he was just
that is the face of a broken man
this is by far the best comment anyone has added to my text post
Rapunzel is the only Disney Princess to have green eyes, and the second Disney heroine to have green eyes after Esmeralda.
Well, there is Dean, but he isn’t from Disney.
But Dean is a pretty princess.
I don’t watch Supernatural but now i want to
ten inch dick aka longer than my forearm
i know there are some writers who follow me
I believe the average is 6 inches? The longest is 14, an he suffers dizziness when he gets a boner, and even though he’s heterosexual, he can only have sex with men (or anally with women) as his cock can’t fit in a vagina.
So writers, take note.
jesus h. christ
I once had a boyfriend who was quite well-endowed, and that was some painful, annoying shit right there (especially with a selfish dude who didn’t really think about that/blamed me for being “tiny,” what the fuck). The average vagina is 3-4 inches deep, though some women may have a depth of 6-7 inches.
Of course, a lady’s Sarlaac Pit is designed to accomodate rather large things. That does not, however, mean that it is comfortable or fun to have those large things in your hermetically-sealed shame basket, not to mention have it ramming repeatedly against your cervix. Ow fucking ow.
Contrary to popular belief, bigger is NOT ALWAYS BETTER.
A rectum can be between 5-7 inches deep. A pliable dildo could push past that, taking that sharp curve into the large intestine, if you’re patient and flexible and you have a lot of lube at your disposal. And you don’t mind things being in your INTESTINES, oh my God. A hard dick, however, that isn’t so bendy, would be another story entirely.
So if you’re shooting for realistic sex and your bottom isn’t into pain, you may want to reconsider giving your top anything over 7-8 inches of dick. 10+ inches might sound awesome but like Communism, for most people at least, it’s better in theory than it is in practice.
This very NSFW and TMI-imbued post brought to you by all the fucks I do not give.
Oh and if anyone accuses me of kink shaming I will find you and I will skin you.
ive learned a lot today omg
i think the last of my innocence just got killed reading this
why am i reblogging this
As a writer, I genuinely thank you. Thank God for tumblr. Where the hell else am I going to learn this sort of stuff? Not school or my parents, that’s for damn sure. *sighs*
hermetically sealed shame basket
this post is gold
Octopus changes colour outside the water
It looks like it’s dying
OH GOD. THAT’S SO FUCKING SCARY.
Waaaaait whoa. Guys. He’s also changing the texture of his skin, along with attempting to match the tone of the ship’s(?) floor.
HE’S TRYING TO BLEND IN.
HE KNOWS HE’S IN DANGER AND HE’S SCARED AND DOESN’T WANT TO BE SEEN.
SHHHHH NO BABY OCTOPUS COME HERE IT’S OKAY <3
We literally have a shape shifting animal with the best camouflage mechanism in nature and nobody thinks that’s the coolest shit like what the fuck we could learn so much from it’s biology everyone needs to get outta my face cause this creature is metal as fuck
There’s one better than this. It’s the cuttlefish. (I watch a lot of animal documentaries, okay?)
No but you have to post a gif of the cuttlefish now. Animal shows are the best shows because nature
the ninjas of the sea
y’all see this motherfucker right here?
this is the Indonesian Mimic Octopus.
This cool little guy can mimic a crab, lionfish, sea snake, flatfish, and jellyfish. He uses these amazing disguise techniques to avoid and deter predators, and also to attract possible meals.
he is the sneakiest ninja of the sea
It’s also worth noting that the Octopus has an incredibly advanced nervous system that controls all of these abilities and it’s able to detect and react insanely fast to the situation at hand as you can see from these .gifs.